Holiday time………Happy? Sad? Anxious? Fearful?
But….. some people in the room are not feeling it, they feel lonely, depressed, scared, anxious and the people around them do not even notice.
Family histories dictate the mood of the gathering and people become very anxious and nervous waiting for things to explode.
Blended families also have challenges, the children now have 2 sets of families and either have to choose which family to be with or have two gatherings on the same day. The blend depending on how well it was handled at inception will determine how things pan out at gatherings.
Thanksgiving is about giving thanks for what we have . Sometimes we are not thankful for what we have because what we have is unhappy, abusive, depressing, painful, financially a struggle and much more.
Our Inner Child can also play a big part in the proceedings and we act out with the re-creation of the emotions we felt as children growing up.
Some people have many choices and are happily enjoying these choices, but there are some people, who through a sense of duty, guilt or loyalty have to be somewhere they really do not want to be. You can get through this and do not have to live the rest of your life dreading every family gathering. Seek professional help to overcome these feelings. Many of my clients have stories to tell, I myself can tell you a few!!! I continually work on my feelings from my childhood but I also notice the children around me and can see the signs and go out of my way to help them.
If you see the children in your family looking as though they are fearful of the people around them, be the person they can trust and share the secret they are not aloud to share. Be there for them even if there was nobody there for you.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving and please give thanks and be grateful for what you have…….whatever that is, also be thankful for having the courage to make the right choices on the day.