How can I Live Without Them

Losing someone you love to a death can be unbearable, the sadness, the feeling that your heart is going to break, the crying you think will never stop and above all you feel nobody understands what you are going through.
Grief some say is a process you have to go through and suggest these are the steps

  • Denial and Isolation
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance

I am not sure it is always this way or even in that order. My opinion is that everyone goes through losing a loved one in their own way depending on the relationship they have with the person and also their emotional state at the time.
We acquire life experience through experiencing life and not everyone has the same life experience even if you are part of the same family your experience is different.
Consequently your reaction to losing a loved one and your coping with that loss will be as individual to you as your own life experience is.
My own experience and that of some of my clients did not always experience all of the 5 stages and not in any order.
The first death I experienced was my beloved Grand Mother, she was my mentor, teacher, guide, and a real mother to me. She was 94 when she passed after a very short illness. She was born in 1900 and I loved hearing all her stories of how technology and the world had evolved from the Victorian times.
I was devastated, I can’t say I was in denial but I did feel isolated, I felt nobody else understood or could feel what I was feeling. I was confused at some of the family not feeling as bad as me.

Extract from Tap Your Grief Away

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